From "California woman drops phone into outhouse, falls in headfirst and gets stuck" posted Friday in the Mercury News:
A woman who accidentally dropped her phone into the hole of a vault toilet fell in while trying to retrieve it and was trapped for more than an hour.
The incident occurred Tuesday afternoon near the parking lot at the summit of Mount Walker, a 2,800-foot mountain at the east edge of Washington’s Olympic National Park, said a social media post from the Brinnon Fire Department.
The woman, described only as a Californian in her 40s, was trying to retrieve the phone that had fallen into the toilet.
She disassembled and removed the seat so she could lie down and lean into the hole, clinging with one hand to the dog leash she had tied to a support. The leash “failed, and she slid into and fell into the vault headfirst,” the fire department’s report said.
After about 20 minutes of unsuccessfully attempting to climb out, she used her phone to call 911.
My take: Write your own punchline.