Not an Apple Watch rescue story

From "California woman drops phone into outhouse, falls in headfirst and gets stuck" posted Friday in the Mercury News:

A woman who accidentally dropped her phone into the hole of a vault toilet  fell in while trying to retrieve it and was trapped for more than an hour.

The incident occurred Tuesday afternoon near the parking lot at the summit of Mount Walker, a 2,800-foot mountain at the east edge of Washington’s Olympic National Park, said a social media post from the Brinnon Fire Department.

The woman, described only as a Californian in her 40s, was trying to retrieve the phone that had fallen into the toilet.

She disassembled and removed the seat so she could lie down and lean into the hole, clinging with one hand to the dog leash she had tied to a support.   The leash “failed, and she slid into and fell into the vault headfirst,” the fire department’s report said.

After about 20 minutes of unsuccessfully attempting to climb out, she used her phone to call 911.

My take: Write your own punchline.


  1. Ken Cheng said:
    I’m picturing the outhouse scene in Slumdog Millionaire.

    April 23, 2022
  2. Cy Manning said:
    I like my iPhone . . . a lot . . . but not nearly that much.

    Such incidents are explicitly why I have AppleCare. Never needed it, but hell if I’m digging through a toilet for my iPhone. My plan – shout expletive, flush, walking away, and call the AppleCare hotline . . . with someone else’s iPhone.

    April 23, 2022
  3. David Emery said:
    I remember seeing a film version of the Decameron, in Italian with English subtitles. The husband is coming home, the lover goes to hide in the garderobe. There’s loud crashing, about a minute of yelling in Italian, with a brief English subtitle: “Help, Help! I’ve fallen into the s**t!”

    April 23, 2022
  4. Michael Goldfeder said:
    Nothing like the great outdoors. The bears and other wildlife must be laughing hysterically without the assistance of nitrous oxide. I just want to know if it was an iPhone?

    April 23, 2022
  5. Alan Trerise said:
    I see an ad for iCloud backup.

    April 23, 2022
    • Alan Birnbaum said:
      I would call it a “data dump ” /s

      April 24, 2022
    • Steven Philips said:
      I don’t think “backup” was the problem!

      April 24, 2022
  6. Steven Philips said:
    Seems (explicitly?) no indication it was an iPhone.
    “Help!” google, google, google. “Help!” google, google, google. Barf

    April 23, 2022
  7. In Barrio Voladoras, ‘79.- ‘81, we had 2 Windsor chairs, side by side, holes cut in the seats. Plantains dense on all sides of a rotting 8’ x 14’ hut floor. Never forgot the view of Mona Passage in front. It was built there for cane cutters. Took your dear life in your hands to sit there in a tropical storm but you still had to go…
    You dropped something it became part of the ecosystem.

    April 23, 2022
  8. Romeo A Esparrago Jr said:
    The first responder peers in and asks: “How long you been stuck looking for your iPhone in that hole?”
    She replied, “Many moons”

    April 23, 2022
  9. Jerry Doyle said:
    It was an iPhone. How else can one explain her diving into crap to retrieve the device. Only an iPhone user would make such an effort.

    April 23, 2022
  10. Bart Yee said:
    The rest of the article:
    “Rescue crews responded from the Brinnon and Quilcene fire departments, each about 10 miles away. They handed down items that she could stand on, and when she was within their reach, they pulled her out.

    She suffered no physical injuries.

    “The patient was washed down and given a Tyvek suit to wear,” the account said. She was “strongly encouraged to seek medical attention” because of her immersion in human waste, “but she only wanted to leave,” the report says.

    “She thanked the responders and continued her journey back to California,” it concludes.

    Vault toilets on national recreation land generally have a pit at least 5 feet deep that can hold more than 500 gallons of waste.”

    Who wouldn’t want to avoid telling this story to ER personnel or anyone else for that matter ever again? OTOH, if it was an iPhone, there might be an AppleCare claim coming…or going…

    April 25, 2022

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